Who Invented Foxes?
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Posted by Wrongfellow on 11 May 2015.
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Top Ten

These are the best quotes on the site, as voted for by you, the users! We need more votes to make this work well, so please tell us what you think.

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In bookshop:
Customer:"I'm trying to find the complete works of Karl Marx"
Person working in shop: "Who is it by?"
    Posted by RvA on 23 Dec 2009. + (7) - (0) Permalink
J.K. Rowling. Everything's done by her.
    Posted by Tiger on 23 May 2010.

News headline: "Something Went Wrong in Plane Crash, Expert Says"
    Posted by JT on 3 Jan 2010. + (7) - (0) Permalink
Might be something to do with the remains of the bomb we found in the engine. Just a thought.
    Posted by Destrii on 11 Jan 2010.
The plane failed to fly right in the crash.
    Posted by sawblade5 on 26 Feb 2010.
Call me wild, but I think they might have gotten the crash procedure correct. It was just the landing that needed some work.
    Posted by breadbocks on 4 Apr 2010.

News: "Diana was still alive just hours before she died."
    Posted by JT on 3 Jan 2010. + (7) - (0) Permalink

My sister is 2 and she's already humping things!?!? Does that mean that she's destinied for whoredom?!?!
    (From http://answers.yahoo.com/question/ind...)
    Posted by Moosh on 10 Jan 2010. + (7) - (0) Permalink
I think the responses are as funny as the questions: "Toddlers masturbate for the same reason that older children do: It feels good!" and "She may be just as curious about her genitals as she is about her fingers, toes, and belly button — and if she's recently switched from diapers to underpants, she may be able to get to them for the first time."
    Posted by CheddarBBQ on 10 Jan 2010.

"Why did the Pre-Cambrian start?"
    Posted by JT on 25 Jan 2010. + (7) - (0) Permalink

"Is it okay for a Catholic priest to wear socks with scandals?" - another lovely typo!
    Posted by JT on 5 Mar 2010. + (7) - (0) Permalink
Catholic priests and sockpuppet-related scandals. I'm lovin' it!
    Posted by Moosh on 5 Mar 2010.
I think we've got a few of these now. Do we need a "Typos" category?
    Posted by Wrongfellow on 5 Mar 2010.
I suppose we could - they're a worthwhile form of humour in their own right. I originally thought we should avoid simple mistakes as fundamental misunderstandings/blatant stupidity are funnier, but I couldn't resist this one.
    Posted by JT on 6 Mar 2010.
No. They can only have their togas.
    Posted by breadbocks on 4 Apr 2010.

"Sherlock Holmes used to drink in this very pub you know!"
    Posted by Olipro on 14 Sep 2009. + (6) - (0) Permalink
You think Agatha Christie was real too, don't you?
    Posted by Socky on 20 Sep 2009.
Robin Hood pissed in these very woods you know?
    Posted by Tiger on 31 Oct 2009.
Winnie the Pooh shat in these ones...
    Posted by JT on 19 Nov 2009.
If the Pope s**ts in the woods with no-one there to see him, does it make a smell?
    Posted by Wrongfellow on 19 Nov 2009.
I believe it does, but the smell can only be detected by Cretan barbers who shave themselves.
    Posted by JT on 19 Nov 2009.

American tourist visiting the British countryside: "Where are all the hobbits?"
    Posted by JT on 18 Sep 2009. + (6) - (0) Permalink
Dwelling in their holes, of course.
    Posted by Socky on 20 Sep 2009.
"New Zealand."
    Posted by David Gerard on 20 Oct 2009.

"If you're going to act spontaneously, at least plan it in advance."
    Posted by JT on 6 Oct 2009. + (6) - (0) Permalink
If you fail to plan, you plan to fail....
    Posted by Mhaille on 27 Oct 2009.

Dude #1: Terrorists did 911! We should go and kill all the terrorists!

Dude #2: Dude, 911 was done with explosives. Just watch the videos. The towers drop in a perfect sequence.

Dude #1: You're lying! You're one of them traitors sticking up for the terrorists!

Dude #2: Whatever, dude.
    Posted by Socky on 21 Nov 2009. + (7) - (1) Permalink
Crazy assertions and where they come from.
    Posted by Socky on 21 Nov 2009.
Isn't 911 done with a phone?
    Posted by CheddarBBQ on 21 Nov 2009.
No! That's what they're trying to make you believe!
    Posted by Socky on 21 Nov 2009.