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"See, my theory is that if this bit of wood is Beethoven's Fifth Symphony..."
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Posted by Wrongfellow on 15 Mar 2014.
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Colleague to me (I am dressed in a long dress as Ophelia): Nice! Where's your unicorn?
Me: ...
Colleague: You're the naked lady, aren't you? Lady Godiva?
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Posted by poppy on 9 Mar 2014.
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Colleague: Emma, can you come and help me? How do you get on the Australia section of facebook? Or can you only see when you are in Australia?
Me: ...
Colleague: Oh, am I being stupid? Is Facebook a UK only site?
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Posted by poppy on 9 Mar 2014.
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"If you're going to write, you should write about something you understand."
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Posted by Wrongfellow on 7 Feb 2014.
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"Less than half of schools are performing worse than average." (Michael Gove, British Secretary of State for Education, who presumably went to one of those schools. Another minister asked Gove if he thought it was possible for more than half of schools to perform better than average; Gove replied that it was, if the schools performing worse than average "improved continually.")
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Posted by JT on 3 Feb 2014.
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Most people have more than the average number of legs. (What do you mean by "average"?)
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Posted by Wrongfellow on 8 Feb 2014.
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Pregnant woman: "It's like I've got something wriggling around inside me!"
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Posted by Wrongfellow on 25 Jan 2014.
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"Police in Manchester have found what are believed to be parts for the first 3D gun ever discovered in Britain." (BBC News)
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Posted by JT on 20 Jan 2014.
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Fortunately, it can only fire 2D bullets.
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Posted by Wrongfellow on 25 Jan 2014.
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